Changing Rooms - are they really the biggest challenge to trans inclusion? 🏊♀️
"It’s just that I don’t want to get undressed with a trans woman..." but why?
I do a lot of media interviews, I speak to a lot of people, I see a lot of comments and posts online, I read and hear a lot of opinions. One thing I often see is people saying that they have no problem with transgender people but there are some things that need more attention. They feel they are an ally, they feel their views are inclusive, but there are some with exceptions, and one of those is the swimming pool changing room.
If that is you, or if someone in your life gives seemingly plausible reasons for not totally accepting transgender people as the gender they are, then read on.
Changing Rooms
‘I have no problem with transgender people but I wouldn’t want to get undressed in close proximity to a transgender woman.’
If you dig deeper, what are the reasons behind that?
But before you do, pop into the bathroom and take your clothes off and look in the mirror, and ask yourself one question:
“How would you feel if someone else got to judge where you get undressed simply because of how your body looks?”
Now, let’s dig deep.
Is it because you might see their genitals?
Most of the trans women that I have met and listened to do not love the fact that they have a penis, and many would rather it wasn’t there, and they spend much time hiding it. This idea that they will prance naked round the changing room, dangling it in your face, is just so far from the truth.
Do you feel they may see your body differently?
Trans women in a female changing room are women, they live as women, they think like women, they see life and other women, as women. They see you in the same way that other women see you. They aren’t men and they don’t think like men. We don’t worry that lesbian women in a female changing room may be a risk, and nor are trans women, it is just not reality.
Are you scared they may hurt you or look at you in some way?
There is absolutely no evidence that trans women are a risk to others in terms of physical or sexual violence. In fact the opposite is true, they are at risk. If you make transgender women use male facilities there is much evidence that they are victims of hate crime, abuse, assault and violence.
Do they just make you feel uncomfortable?
That may be a very true feeling for you, but what right do you have to expect a whole group of people to be excluded from a changing room just because of your own discomfort? Dig deep and wonder whether you have the right to make that happen? There are alternatives for people to use if they feel personal discomfort, rather than enforcing expulsion for a whole set of women with a particular characteristic.
Is it because they have a male body?
Interestingly, what is a ‘male’ body and do they actually have that? Male and female are gender identities, so a body can’t actually be ‘male’. If you mean they have different body parts to you, then think deep on how appropriate it is to request excluding trans women from female spaces simply because their body isn’t what someone else thinks qualifies. There are lots of people with different looking bodies, differences, variations. In the same way that we simply wouldn’t say that people with black skin or people with only one arm can’t do this that or the other, people who have a different body to you are still just people.
Is it because you want to protect your daughter?
All people need protection from people who may harm them, of course. But there has to be a real risk of harm from transgender women towards girls, and there just isn’t the evidence to back that up.
Is there a problem to be had?
Trans women are not entering women’s changing rooms to make anyone feel unsafe. They are doing what everyone else is doing, getting changed, trying to keep their dignity, trying to get on with their lives. The evidence does not show that trans women are a threat, but it does show that trans people are placed at risk when we force them into spaces where they don’t belong.
If you feel uneasy, that feeling deserves honesty and reflection, not laws, not blame, and not a rule that pushes a whole group of women out of public life. The fair solution is the one we already use in a civil society: more privacy options for anyone who wants them, without turning one group into “the problem.”
The question isn’t really “Where should trans women get changed?”
The real question is: Do we believe some people should lose their dignity so others don’t have to look at their own discomfort?
Over to You
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This is part of a series examining cases, commentary and hearings concerning gender identity. If you have a case or article you’d like me to review, get in touch.