Gender identity, expression and sexuality are separate things

Two identical twins, raised with the same love and the same freedom, grew up to be entirely different people: one a heterosexual man, the other transgender. Their story is a clear, lived demonstration that gender identity, gender expression, and sexuality are three distinct aspects of who we are, and that confusing them costs people dearly.

Gender identity, expression and sexuality are separate things

A parent's message arrived in my inbox that stopped me in my tracks. Two twins, raised identically, with complete freedom to be themselves. One is a heterosexual man. The other is transgender. Their story offers something genuinely valuable to the conversation around gender: a clear, lived demonstration that gender identity, gender expression, and sexuality are three separate things entirely.

We often conflate these concepts, and that confusion leads to misunderstanding. When we see two people raised in identical circumstances diverge in their gender identity, it tells us something important about where that identity comes from, and what role environment, choice, and freedom actually play.

Read the full article to explore what their story teaches us about these crucial distinctions, and why getting this right matters for how we support young people and their families.

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